Other half
by GemiiniiCaptord
Summary: It's a humanstuck where the trolls and beta kids are in high school. It's also my first fanfic ever, so it might suck. Mostly Sollux x Aradia, but there's a bit of Karezi as well. Rated T because it's homestuck, if you've met Karkat, you know what THAT means! Hope you enjoy :3
1. Chapter 1

Hiya! This is my first submission to this website, and my first Homestuck fanfic. I may add other chapters in the future if I am asked to. Anyways, in this story the trolls are sophomores in high school, along with the beta kids. Alright, I'll shut up now. Enjoy! :)

Your name is Aradia Megido, and you are not used to the cold.

Your brown eyes scan the clouds for a hint of the snow letting up, but to no avail. The weather doesn't bother you so much, but your mother is attempting to shield herself from it, as if it were acid. Your mother is an interesting person. She has never been here in New Brunswick before, but then again, neither have you. You have lived in Florida since you were born. This is the first time you have ever moved, let alone to a different country.

You don't really know how you got into this situation. You don't know how your mom just stopped loving your father. You don't know how she could just get a divorce and move on so easily. You don't know how you could handle it when your father started crying as he left. You don't know why your mother had to go all the way to Canada to leave the memories behind. You do love your mother, but love doesn't mean understanding. The one you truly love and _understand _is your father. You miss him. You miss Florida too. You probably have more snow in your dark, wavy hair than you have ever seen in your entire life.

It's December 13th, and feels like -30 degrees outside. You stand on the worn sidewalk in your new, dark grey, extremely itchy winter jacket and soaking wet brown boots. You are laying eyes on your new home for the first time through the mist of your breath, while your mother unpacks. It's pretty standard; smallish, white siding and black tile roofing. About a foot of snow covers the only evidence of a front yard. It has a single-car garage out behind the house, connected to a pavement driveway. The only neighbors the place has is a tall yellow house surrounded by a thick cluster of trees, and an old pizza place that seems to have been out of business for at least a century.

The street seems pretty quiet. Or, quiet enough until you collapse onto the icy sidewalk! The impact hits your spine hard and effectively forces the wind out of you. You start to pray for the world to stop spinning. As your vision clears, you hear footsteps. Suddenly a boy comes into view above you while you lay on your back. But he is not looking at you. The boy is yelling at whoever pushed you off your feet. He starts to run after this person. You force yourself to sit up, and have a chance to see what is going on. The person who pushed you was a girl! She had long black hair and a sharp visage, sharp seemed like the perfect word to describe her. She looks to be the same age as you, as well as the boy, who has blonde spiked hair and glasses.

" what the hell ii2 wrong wiith you Vrii2ka?!"

" Mind y8ur m8nners, fo8r-eyes!"

The yelling continues for over fifteen minutes straight, the time it takes for the girl, apparently named Vriska, to promptly punch the boy in the face, and abscond down the street. The boy is sprawled out over the sidewalk, face up with his glasses chipped on the pavement. You work your way towards him, careful not to slip on the ice. You crouch down to get a good look at him. He has a pointed chin, but there is something soft about him you can't place. He's pretty thin, and wearing only a red sweater and blue finger-less gloves to protect from the cold. His black skate shoes and dark jeans look out of place in the winter snow. He looks to be a few inches taller than you.

" hell0?"

" hii.."

His eyes are closed in a wince, and the apple-sized spot on his left cheek where Vriska hit him is rapidly turning purple.

" why w0uld she hit y0u?

" becau2e that'2 vrii2ka 2erket. fuck, iice hurt2 liike a biitch.."

You have to stifle a gasp as his eyes open. His eyes... One is a brilliant sky blue, the other is a golden-hazel color. He seems to notice your surprise though, and looks away nervously.

"my eye2?"

"yes... How are they..."

"ii get that look a lot, ii wa2 born wiith eye2 liike thii2."

He was lisping. You strangely find it cute. He starts to get up with a groan, and you try to help. He gives you a look that suggests he can do it on his own, and you give him a look that suggests your help is not optional. He seems to steady himself by holding your arm a bit longer than necessarily, but maybe thats just in your mind. Wait, why would it be in your mind? Why are you thinking this? Should you be thinking this?... You don't know...

" are you alriight?.."

" 0h, s0rry. i guess i just spaced 0ut.. 0_0"

Well done Aradia, that was intelligent. You have a mental facepalm x2 combo.

" okay... 2o.. are you new iin town?.."

" um, yeah. we just g0t here less than an h0ur ag0.."

" oh, wow. uh, any iidea what 2chool you wiill be goiing to?"

When you say the name of the school he seems to perk up, even more so when you say it will your sophomore year.

" cool, we miight even end up iin the 2ame cla22!"

" i w0nder, maybe we will.. um, what's y0ur name?"

He opens his mouth to speak, but is interrupted by your mother calling you to come inside to take a look around. The boy gives a shy smile.

" ii gue22 ii better go, and i wiill 2ee you at your new 2chool 2oon.."

" 0kay..bye.."

You smile back and race up the driveway. You find out too late that you got too careless, when the ice slides your feet off of the cold ground and into the air. You feel fast hands stop your fall, and you once again stare into the boy's incredible eyes, that at this time, look just as surprised as you are.

" s-s0rry 0_0 um, thank y0u.."

" no problem.."

You allow him to help you stand upright. He waves goodbye and makes his way up the sidewalk. You watch him leave and shake some of the falling snow from your jacket, then turn to the new place to call home. You find yourself smiling at your boots, but you can't help it.

Your name is Aradia Megido, and you may just have a crush on a boy you barely know.

Your name is Sollux Captor, and you may have just seen the most beautiful girl you have ever laid eyes on.


	2. Chapter 2

Hi, I'm back! So, in less than twenty four hours, I got a single review that just completely made my day. It has all of my happy right now. All of it. So since I'm home, derping online, I'm working on this fic. And thanks to the encouraging words of my best friend, I'm going to keep working on this fic. Enjoy :3

Your name is Sollux Captor and you are shivering like a baby.

It's been three hours since you told your father you were going out for a short walk. He had told you to wear something warm. You had ignored him. Stupid, stupid, _stupid._ You don't even know why you were mad at him before you left. All he had done was use your laptop for two minutes to look up something on Google. He didn't need to ask! He was the one who had bought it for you for your last birthday. Why did you flip your shit when you found him on Google using it? You suppose it's because you didn't want him to find your hacker codes, but he already knows about them. You know that he knows about them. Fuck. He had even tried to apologize, but you didn't want to hear it. You had grabbed the first sweater you saw, put on your old skate shoes (which you now realize was the worst mistake you have ever made) and went out the door. _Stupid!_

When you first stepped outside, it was cloudy, but you had thought nothing of it. You had decided to head to the right, maybe you would turn around at the pizza place, the one you hadn't seen open since you where born. You had forgotten that Vriska's house is near the old apartment building that you live in. And at the time, she had been leaning against a tree, chatting with one of her mean friends. As soon as you turned the corner, your eyes locked with her sharp ones.

She had swatted her friend's shoulder, and pointed in your direction, grinning smugly. You were toast. If there's one thing Vriska knows, it's how to get whatever she wants. You tried to ignore them and walk past the two, but they started to circle around you. They looked like two wolves, mentally deciding the best way to kill their prey, as painfully as possible. The only option left, was to run. Vriska tripped you as you tried that, and swiped something from your pocket. You started trying to remember what she could have taken from your sweater's pocket. Your cell phone! You angrily flip over to your front side up, to see that is _exactly _what she took.

Vriska and her chuckling cohort started to bolt away from you as you picked yourself up off the ground. Your only option was to chase after them. You took your glasses off for a minute to wipe them off on the only part of your sweater that wasn't wet, and put then back on. It was starting to snow at this time, and the frosty wind made you shiver. You started to run after the duo, though not quite as fast; the snow was flying into your glasses, making you half blind. You were completely _freezing_, Vriska tripping you made you wet and covered in snow, but still, if you lost your cell phone, it was going to be _your_ problem. You would have to save up to get a replacement. There was no way your parents were helping you out of this mistake. It was your dumb idea to forget your phone in your pocket.

If there's one thing Vriska _hates, _it's when someone gets in the way of her plans. As you turned the corner, you saw a girl standing in the snow, directly in Vriska's path! Without a second thought, Vriska pushed her out of the way. The girl fell hard, on icy concrete. You ran up to her and waited till you knew she was okay, till she opened her eyes. You carefully stepped around her. Vriska had stopped and turned around, probably to witness your reaction.

After she had punched you and ran off, you felt as though you were going to throw up. You didn't dare open your eyes, you knew you would start to cry. _Stupid! Why did I even try?! I just keep embarrassing myself. _That's when you heard a soft voice.

" hell0?"

"hii.."

You tried to tell yourself that your voice didn't shake as much as how you heard it. That was when you saw the girl's face as you opened your eyes. But, it was different... When others saw your eyes, some were scared. Some were shocked. Some just stared. But when you looked at her face, into her eyes, what you saw was.. Amazement. She looked into your eyes, how someone would look at a beautiful painting.

That's why, currently, as you make your way back home in what has become a snowstorm, soaked to the bone, colder than any healthy human being should ever be, after losing your cell phone, after having a fight with your father, losing your glasses somewhere on a sidewalk, after being punched by Vriska, and completely humiliated, you are smiling like a lovestruck idiot.

And right now, you don't even care.

When you finally reach home, and see dad, what you expected was anger. Instead he races towards you. He starts to cry. And he pulls you into a huge hug. He's begging you to never scare him like that again. He feels you shivering and hugs you tighter. The starts to apologize again about the computer. He says that you have every right to be angry at him. He says he loves you so much.

" ii am 2o 2orry dad. ii love you two.."

You have never seen your dad cry since your mother passed away. But this time, he's smiling.

And you're smiling back.

Your name is Aradia Megido, and as you start to walk up your driveway, you see something in the snow. You suppose it would be impossible to get your feet more wet than they already are, so you march into the snow and retrieve the small object. It turns out, it's a cell phone. It almost seems as if someone had thrown it into the snow. It's in a leather protective case, thankfully. You carefully slide it out of the case, and press the power button. It still works! But there is still one problem.. Who does this phone belong to? Maybe you could look at the pictures? You flip through some of the photos. Wait. You stop at one picture, and feel your heart race. In the picture, is the boy you just talked to. In this picture, he is a lot younger, standing in between a man and a woman, who you immediately recognize as his mother and father. His dad has hazel eyes, and his mother's are blue. You start to smile, because you can see now, that written on a piece of paper inside the leather case, is a name. A very nice name.

Sollux Captor.

Reviews would be awesome! Hope you liked it :3


	3. Chapter 3

**Sorry for disappearing like that! To hopefully make up for that lost time, I tried to write an especially long chapter. Sorry in advance if I get OOC in this chapter, I'm still learning. You people are awesome. All of you. Awesome. I thank you, anyone reading this. You do realize that this is the first fanfiction that I have ever even attempted to write in my entire life... But you people seem to enjoy it, so... Here's chapter 3!**

**...**

Your name is Aradia Megido, and you're quietly sobbing.

After you had been signed in, and grabbed a printed copy of your new schedule, you were quickly escorted by the vice principal to your new homeroom. Your new high school is quite a large building, and has apparently been around for quite a long time. Countless teenagers rushed through halls, groups of girls, texting or laughing with their friends, while most boys were shoving each other into locker doors, or talking about hockey. You found yourself searching for only one person though. Instead, you found the person you wanted to see the _least. _She gave you a stare that made you feel as though she was about to throw a knife at your head. Vriska doesn't strike you as a very forgiving person. It's not like you did anything wrong! You hadn't seen her running towards you that day!

The vice principal had halted at a door, and you stepped inside the classroom. At the front of the class was a petite woman, with short black hair and oval shaped glasses. The woman was bent over her large wooden desk, organizing hundreds of papers and clutter. She looked up as you slowly made your way towards her.

" Oh, you must be Miss Aradia Megido! Welcome to our school! You may call me Miss Crocker."

" nice t0 meet y0u."

Students start to file into the classroom as the bell rings. Everything seemed pretty organized until you heard shouting.

" STOP FUCKING SHOVING ME TWAT-HEAD!"

" kk, calm your tiit2 iim not even touchiing you!"

Miss Crocker calmly reached into her desk drawer to find some Aspirin, as you turned around to find two teenage boys stumbling into the classroom, one of which you recognized. The shorter of the two, the one you hadn't recognized, lost his balance and collapsed in front of you.

" are y0u 0kay? 0_0 "

" YES BITCH IM FINE!"

A redhead managed to sift through the small crowd gathered at the doorway, giggling loudly. You realized she was blind as she poked the boy's cheek with her white cane.

" H3H3H3! S1LLY K4RKL3S :] "

" SUCK MY DICK TEREZI! "

" F1N3, YOU L1TTL3 GRUMP ;] "

Terezi grinned at his shocked, bright red face, you supposed she could tell he was embarrassed by his silence, and she managed to pull him to his feet. As this was happening, you locked your brown eyes with heterochromatic ones. You offered Sollux a small smile of recognition and he returned it, along with a silent wave. He has a sweet smile.

Miss Crocker sighed. " Now, everyone to their seats please, and Karkat, please calm down dear. Watch the language." The last sentence sounded somewhat tired, as if she had already given up on hoping he would comply to her wishes. He shuffled to his seat at the back of the classroom and put his chin on top of the desk, glaring at his fellow students angrily. You honestly have never seen someone so furious at everything. You turned your attention to the line of students stepping into the room, including, to your absolute horror, _Vriska Serket. _Although you were not very happy to have her in your class, she was not your main focus. You had been glancing upward at a smiling face caked in clown makeup. You found it to be slightly creepy. He towered over you; he was at least a foot taller than you or Sollux. He was extremely thin for his height and had a bundle of black hair framing his face. He also smelled a little strange, but at least he seemed friendly. You had come to that conclusion by how he was wheeling someone else into the room. The boy in the wheelchair smiled shyly up at you, and you returned it. He looked a bit like you in some ways. Same brown hair and brown eyes, and decently tanned skin.

**...**

Class was a tad confusing. It was as if you were a new employee in a large factory; everyone seemed to know where to go, when they had to be there, and what they were meant to be doing, except you. After you were introduced to the class, you were given a seat near the back of the room. You sit next to Sollux, to your delight, and on your other side, Nepeta, who you were quickly acquainted with after she squealed and hopped in place, the second you informed her that _yes, _you do enjoy roleplay. The only thing you found _less than satisfactory _was that in the seat directly behind you, sat Vriska. For hours, she had managed to pester you in every class. She flicked pieces of eraser at you, she chucked crumpled paper at your head, she poked your back with sharp pencils, she shoved you in the hallways on the way to science class, she even tripped you in gym! By the time lunch came, you were _not_ feeling too perky on your first day of school.

You stood in line with your lunch tray at the ready. You picked up your spaghetti and paid the lunch lady, then scanned the cafeteria for a spot to sit. That is, until the entire tray was flipped vertical, spaghetti staining your shirt, clinging to your clothes, hair and shocked face, as you stumbled backwards into... _Sollux!? _Your mind was spinning. As you glanced at Vriska's smirking face, everything had just seemed to crash down on you.

" I think your ugly face m8ght just look even more disgusting th8t way, if that is 8ven possi8ble! ::::) "

Vriska flashed a satisfied, toothy grin at her work; you were _covered _in pasta. Sollux's expression showed mixed emotions. He looked to be arguing with himself inside. You couldn't speak, even as you felt the sting of tears under your eyelids. You could have heard a pin drop in the cafeteria. Everyone was watching you, waiting for your next move. Minutes pass. You found you couldn't hold the tears back any longer. The only sound in the _entire cafeteria,_ is your quiet sobbing. You stand in the center of the cafeteria, right now, in front of the whole student body, and every pair of eyes in the room are staring straight at you, while you _cry like a baby._

That is when Sollux makes your next move for you. His steps are confident and swift. The walks past you.. And stops inches away from Vriska. He lifts an arm. He doesn't reconsider his course of action. In one fast move,_ he slaps Vriska right across her face._

Judging by her reaction, his slap is anything but gentle. It's the kind of slap, that could get anyone suspended from school. And unfortunately, for both Sollux and you, the principal of the school has just witnessed this move on Sollux's part. And she is not one to let this slide.

**...**

Your name is Sollux Captor, and you feel like you can't breathe.

You just saw it it happen in slow motion. It's no secret to you that Vriska is being a total bitch to Aradia... You stop for a minute to think about how Aradia is such a beautiful name_. Gosh, you're really starting to become an idiot around her, aren't you?_

You had just witnessed Vriska gain control of Aradia's lunch tray. Spaghetti flew, covering her in pasta and sauce, and her feet seemed to disobey her, as she tumbled into you, flushing bright red and close to tears at the same time. You obviously wouldn't let her fall, so you stood where you were, even though the collision nearly knocked the wind out of you.

All you can do is stand there like a tool, while Vriska trumps her victory in successfully ruining AA's day. Vriska calls her _ugly. _No one in the cafeteria dares speak. Aradia's eyes flicker towards you, and you can really see how broken she is right now. The sparkle they had at the time she first saw your eyes is long gone. You can tell by her face that she is starting to believe what what Vriska just said to her. That is the last straw. You swallow the rock in your throat. The look on Aradia's face makes your decision for you; you can't just let this happen. You stride towards Vriska, and give her the hardest god damn slap you possibly can.

Her reaction. Is. Just. Priceless. This is the first time she has looked like more of an idiot than you. Her first instinct is to scream, but it comes out as more of a squeak. You watch her expression change from shocked, to embarrassed, to furious in a matter of seconds. Just as she appears to be preparing to punch the crap out of you, both of you freeze at the sound of someone clearing their throat. You know that sound well. Too well. The voice of the principal seems to echo through the entire school.

" Captor. Megido. My office in 20 minutes or less. If not, you _will _be expelled."

You have to go. There is no other option. There never was, and there never will be, as long as that witch of a principal lives. As she strutted away in her black ankle-high stiletto boots, Aradia turned to face you. You needed to help clean her up, _fast. _She couldn't go to the principal's office _caked in spaghetti. Fuck. _But, maybe Kanaya can clean up this train wreck of a situation.

**...**

You are now standing, waiting, next to the door to the girl's bathroom. Kanaya had understood the situation immediately. The fashionista had grabbed AA's wrist and sped to the washroom, carrying a bundle of spare clothes. In 10 minutes, they both walk out of the restroom, and Aradia looks _gorgeous. _Clean, makeup done, wearing fresh clothes that fit her great. This kind of magic is what Kanaya does best.

" thank2, " you mutter, and begin to guide Aradia by the sleeve down the hallway. Kanaya simply gives you a silent nod. It speaks for itself; she wishes you luck.

You both remain silent, but it's not an uncomfortable silence, more like a nervous one. Neither of you can predict what is going to happen once you reach the office of Ms. Mindfang. You don't know how she got that name, nor if it is her _real _name. You decide the name is probably due to her powers of persuasion; she just has a way of getting inside your head. Her intelligence is razor sharp. But what you, and a good portion of the student body hate most about her, is that she is Vriska's favorite _aunt._ Vriska could do absolutely _anything _at school with no problems. Even the other teachers treated her as untouchable, they just had to deal with her bullying. No one could get Ms. Mindfang's favorite niece in trouble. _Was that huge bitch called to her aunt's office to get chewed out? NO._

" s0llux, how much time do we have left?.. "

" ...about thiirty 2econd2. "

You both race through the hall, disregarding school rules. She starts to lag behind, so she reaches out to grab your hand. You pray she can't see your face heating up.

**10 seconds.**

You find the door, and forcefully pull it open.

**5 seconds.**

You pull out a chair for Aradia.

**2 seconds.**

Ms. Mindfang's eyes are watching your every move.

**Time.**

You slowly sit down in a padded chair in front of the principal's desk. Ms. Mindfang checks her watch, then her eyes meet yours. Her gaze seems to say, _you win, this time._

She takes all the time she needs to fix her jet black locks into a tight bun, watching you with her piercing blue eyes. She is quite young, in her early thirties at the most, but she is one of the tallest people you have ever met.

Aradia hasn't let go of your hand, but she notices you looking at it, and she slides her hand away, possibly embarrassed. Her brown eyes dart upwards, alert as begins to speak.

" Let's discuss your little _event _in the cafeteria this afternoon, Sollux. "

You grip the handles of the chair tighter.

" I believe I must ask, what on earth were you thinking, that would cause you to act so rashly?"

You don't say a thing in response. Her tone of voice was smooth, almost completely calm, but that doesn't fool you. She would kick you out of the school the first chance she got.

" I would advise you to respond, Captor. You may either speak, or be forced to speak, your choice, dear. "

She says " dear " the way someone would say " soulless demon". You open your mouth so say something, anything. But it is not your voice that ends the silence of the room.

" please, st0p. its n0t his fault, he was just trying t0 defend me. "

's eyes show something reminiscent of surprise. You honestly would have never thought it was possible.

" Well then, miss Megido, would you be ever so kind as to fill me in, as to what happened in the cafeteria today? "

AA begins to tell the whole story under the watchful gaze of the principal. 's expression remains blank even as recounts everything Vriska had done to her, all of the poking, prodding and tripping, every single thing Vriska had done to her today. The upsetting thing is, you know how this is going to end. This will the same way it did three days ago when you had attempted to make Vriska pay, after coming to school with that awful bruise on your cheek, from the day you met Aradia in the snow. You had tried to make see reason to punish Vriska, but all it had done was get you detention.

Sure enough, after Aradia finishes her tale, the principal leans back in her armchair, dangerously silent.

" Mr. Captor, four weeks detention for slapping my niece, starting after Christmas break. If you misbehave again before Christmas vacation, there will be worse consequences. Megido, you will be joining him for one week, for telling me such lies about Vriska. "

_Fucking. Predictable._

Aradia seems struck dumb. Then everything seems to slide into place, and she closes her open mouth. You might just be thinking the same thing, _two woman intent on ruining your day, in one family. Just our luck._

You don't dare complain, though. The finalized tone of her voice is enough to dismiss you both from the room. Oh well, she could have done worse. _Much worse. _You rise and slip through the door, as the principal gets to signing some paperwork stacked on her desk. AA follows you out of the room.

" thank y0u.."

" for what? "

" standing up f0r me t0day at lunch. "

You level your eyes with her's. She looks sweet and sincere, which puzzles you, since you don't deserve it at all. It was your fault for getting her detention, after all.. You surprise yourself by how much of a retard you can be sometimes... But she isn't angry in the slightest. She smiles at you, so you smile back. Her smile falters as she remembers something.

" 0h! s0llux, i think I f0und s0mething that bel0ngs t0 y0u.. "

It couldn't be... She slides something out of her pocket. You can't believe it. You might just be wearing the most ridiculous grin ever to be plastered to your face, as she hands you the object you thought was gone forever, your cellphone.

" how ii2 thii2 po22iible?! "

Yes, you are now a complete retard... But, you suppose it's worth it, to see her smile like that. You take your cellphone back like it's a gift from the heavens. She has such a cute laugh.

" i f0und it 0utside in the sn0w! "

" thank you! ii wa2 goiing mental after vrii2ka 2tole iit from me.. "

" thats why y0u were chasing after her that day!.. "

" yeah.. "

You are silent for a while.. It ends up being AA who breaks the silence..

" well... we sh0uld get t0 0ur next class i guess. "

" yeah, let2 go.. "

Aradia shyly gets a little closer to you, then plants a gentle kiss on your cheek. You turned red as a rose within seconds. _God help me..._

She starts walking to math class, and once the blood rushing to your stupid face slows down, and you dab off the waxy red lipstick on your cheek, you follow her like a begging puppy.

Maybe sometime, you could tell her how you feel... _Maybe she wouldn't laugh at you.._

_Maybe.._

**...**

**That's all for now folks! :3 Don't worry, I will keep the chapters coming, slowly but surely! I would like to thank the reviewers! Thank you SO MUCH. Being new to the fanfiction world, I love to know how I'm doing! For those who pay attention to this author's note, I MAY TAKE REQUESTS! :) A ship, a Sadstuck, you call the shots! Thanks again! **

**~ GemiiniiCaptord **


	4. Chapter 4

**Hi there! c: I've been getting busy lately, with school having started again. I still don't know what happened, when I hadn't updated in over a month on the previous chapter! So sorry about that! Anyway, there was something I would like to say before continuing, about a suggestion I got in a review! To _Josiefeathergirl__, _Thank you oh so much for the review! I'm always open to suggestions on how to improve! Though the reasons I use the quirks in the dialog, are:**

**1. I just felt something was missing.**

**2. I have read fanfiction that can get confusing, because the author either did not put the quirks, or sorta changed it up, like indicating Sollux's lisp by replacing his _S's _with _Th's._ I don't hate it, I just find it a tad confusing to read; on some words I have to try to sound it out.**

**3. Just so you can tell who is speaking, so I don't need to go all, Sollux said, Aradia said, Sollux said, Aradia said... Blah blah blah. Because they do talk quite a lot, and there is going to be much more dialog in later chapters. ;)**

**I think I will keep the quirks for now, but if it becomes a true problem, just let me know! Thanks! :)**

**...**

Your name is Sollux Captor, and you are tired as hell.

After an awful day at school courtesy of your idiot move, standing up to Vriska, you arrived home. You had been stupid, if you thought that just _maybe_ Vriska would leave Aradia alone for a while. Things just weren't that simple. You can only imagine how relieved AA must be right now, that this day is _finished_. Even after Vriska covered Aradia in spaghetti, she by _no _means toned the evil down. She enjoys getting people in trouble. Thankfully though, the worst she tried after lunch today, was to pull out the chair Aradia had been preparing to sit down on. Aradia had fallen over on her behind, and you had leaped up to help pull her up off the floor while Vriska cackled with pride._ That snide little bitch..._

You chuck your school bag onto the carpet floor of your bedroom, and flop down into your leather computer chair. Something occurs to you, and you slip your cellphone out of your jean's pocket. When you slide it out of the case, something flutters out and rests on the floor. It's a piece of paper, but not the same piece you left inside intentionally with your name and address, it's larger. You peek inside the case to see that the before mentioned piece of paper, the one you had put inside before the whole Vriska-stole-your-cellphone fiasco, is gone. You reach down to pick up the slip of paper on the floor, and hold it up in front of your face to read. In cursive, it has Aradia's name and below it is her phone number, followed by a cheerful, c_all me! :)_

_No. No way. At least __try __to not be__ so desperate._You're trying to fight the strong impulse to dial her number right now. _What would you even say? Would you have to nerve to actually... Ask her out? _You can answer that question with a big fat _no. _

As idiotic as it sounds, maybe you should ask Karkat what to do. Though he may be the most infuriating son-of-a-bitch you've ever had as a friend, he does know is way around relationships. Due to hours upon hours of romantic comedy movie garbage, one could call him an expert on everything sappy, mushy or downright disgusting, on the subject of romance. You scoot your chair closer to the desk your laptop rests on, and open up pesterchum. Before you have a chance to see if Karkat is online, he opens up a chat with you.

- carcinoGeneticist [CG] began pestering twinArmageddons [TA] -

CG: SOLLUX

CG: WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED AT LUNCH TODAY.

CG: HEY ASSHOLE.

CG: ANSWER ME.

TA: kk you 2aw what happened already along wiith the re2t of the 2chool.

TA: what the fuck do you want from me?

CG: I MEANT *WHAT* THE EVERLOVING FUCK DID MINDFANG SAY.

CG: HOW MUCH BULLSHIT DID SHE THROW AT YOU?

TA: ju2t a month of detentiion, 2tarting after break.

CG: YOU LUCKY LITTLE FUCKER.

TA: 2hut up kk.

TA: we both know how much 2he hate2 you.

CG: I SWEAR TO GOD, THAT WOMEN WILL SUSPEND ME FOR BREATHING.

TA: ye2 ii know kk.

TA: we are both well aware that you hate her gut2.

TA: you have made that very annoyiingly loud and clear, mo2tly due two the fact that you are iincapable of 2hutiing up.

CG: FUCK YOU.

TA: wa2 there an actual poiint two thi2 conver2atiion?

CG: FUCKING FINE.

CG: I WILL NOW GIVE AN EXPLANATION AS TO WHY WE ARE CURRENTLY SAILING ON OUR OWN FUCKING SHIT FILLED TITANIC UPON THE GROTESQUE OCEAN OF MOODY AND DRAMATIC ABSOLUTE HORSEHIT IN THE GASTROINTESTINAL SYSTEM OF THIS POT SMOKING ASSHAG WE CALL OUR EXISTENCE.

CG: BECAUSE ITS PLAINLY FUCKING OBVIOUS

CG: THAT YOU ARE SWOONING OVER THAT NEW GIRL.

TA: what the hell are you talkiing about.

CG: YOU KNOW VERY FUCKING WELL WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT, IDIOT.

CG: SOLLUX DONT YOU DARE PLAY RETARD WITH ME.

CG: YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON HER, DONT YOU?

TA: why do you a2k...

CG: WHY THE ALMIGHTY FUCK DO YOU THINK IM ASKING, CAPTOR?

CG: MUST I WRITE IT IN GODAMN SHARPIE

CG: ALL OVER THE MYSTAKE OF NATURE THAT IS MY FACE

CG: THAT I AM THE LIVING *GOD* OF ROMANTIC ADVICE.

CG: DO YOU HAVE A FUCKING CRUSH ON HER.

TA: ...ye2.

CG: THEN HIKE UP YOUR SKIRT AND ASK HER OUT SHITHEAD.

TA: ii hate you kk.

- carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased pestering twinArmageddons [TA] -

Well, it looks like that takes care of that. It seems like Karkat is more cheerful today than usual. You decide to close pesterchum again, and you push your chair back a bit. You look back down to the cellphone still in your hand. You start to chew the inside of your cheek thoughtfully, trying to silence the turmoil in your mind. _Should you try to ask her out? You've only known her for less than a week. Maybe it should wait. But will you still call her? _You suppose you're okay with just calling her for now. You pick up the slip of paper on the desk and nervously dial her number.

_What's the worst that could happen?_

**...**

Your name is Aradia Megido, and you are feeling _horrible_.

Every part of your body is painfully sore, and you feel like a zombie due to the way you are stumbling around. You have your fingers massaging your temples, in a desperate act to lessen your throbbing headache. You shake off your book bag onto a wooden dining room chair and slip through the hallway to the room you chose as your bedroom. You push open the door and choose to leave the lights off, practically floating to your soft bed. You grip the covers and lean back, guiding them up and over your head. You just lay there in the warm darkness for a little while, letting thoughts drift through your mind. You pull the covers away from your face a little to take in some air.

You don't want to be thinking about Vriska right now, but you are. She hates you so badly. You honestly want nothing to do with her, but she will never give up on tormenting you. You know that. What is it she wants from you? An apology? To give up? You just don't understand why she is so bothered by you. If you knew what you had done or said, to make her so angry, you would gladly apologize or take it back. As much as you dislike what she has done to you today, you don't hate her for it. Why does she want to hurt you?

You felt the tears coming, but it was too late to stop them. You don't make a sound, and simply let them come. They fall down your cheeks onto the white pillow beneath your head. That's when you hear the front door open and close, and your mother's voice calls your name. Her footsteps can be heard clearly from the hall. They stop outside your door. She turns the doorknob slowly to open the door a bit, and peeks through the small space it makes. You can see her squint to try and get a good image of you in the dark room.

" Is something wrong sweetie? "

All you can manage in response is a pitiful whine. Your mom flips on the light, and you close your eyes to the pale brightness. You can hear her step closer to you. She sits down on the edge of your bed and tugs on your arm gently, gesturing for you to sit up. You comply, and she wraps her arms around your shaking form without a word. You let yourself sob into her shoulder. Your mom is patient and quiet. She rubs your back with one hand, waiting for you to calm down.

The only sound in the house is your sobbing, until you hear your cellphone go off in the kitchen. You remember leaving it on the counter earlier this morning. Seeing as you're still in an unbalanced state, your mom stands up, still wiping your tears away, and goes to the kitchen to answer it for you. You can hear your mother's side of the conversation when you quiet down.

" Hello?... Oh, no I don't think you have the wrong number. I'm her mother. Yes... Well, Aradia has just had a hard day I'll bet, I just got home and found her crying in her room, so... Yes, she's still there now, she still hasn't told me what's the matter... I see... What's this girl's name?... Vriska?.. Okay, I was just trying to make sure, you have a bit of a lisp. "

You pull yourself together in record time. There's no doubt in your mind now, Sollux is the one who called you. You slide yourself out of bed, running your hands over your face to remove any remaining moisture. You race out into the hall, straight to the kitchen. You signal to your mom to give you the phone.

" Oh, well it turns out she wants to talk to you. She's looking bit better. Thanks for telling me about that girl Vriska.. Here you go.."

Your mom passes the phone to you. You give her a quick smile and raise the cellular to your ear, while you run back to your room and close the door once again. You clear the lump in your throat and finally manage to say something.

" hell0."

" hii."

" h0w are y0u?"

" iim okay, but ii think ii 2hould be a2kiing you that que2tiion.."

His voice sounds full of concern. It's actually very sweet of him.

" i think im 0kay.."

" good..."

You're both silent for a little while.

" s0, what did y0u want t0 talk ab0ut?"

" ii know ii really 2houldnt 2ay thii2.. but could we talk a biit about vrii2ka?.."

" 0kay..."

" ii.. ii ju2t want to 2ay that you are not alone.. iive been vrii2ka's target for year2. 2even year2 two be exact.."

" that s0unds awful..."

" iit wa2.. mo2tly iin miiddle 2chool. iin miiddle 2chool, 2he u2ed two call me 2tupid 2pity 2ollux, becau2e when ii wa2 younger my li2p cau2ed me two 2pit when ii talked. 2he 2tiill call2 me that 2ometiimes when 2he want2 two get on my nerve2. ii really 2tarted two hate my lii2p, ii 2tiill do. whenever vrii2ka 2aw me 2he would punch me, kiick me or pu2h me on the ground, whiile yelliing that mean niickname.."

" 0h... but y0ur parents must have been w0rried right?"

" well, my dad diidnt really know what two do. ii mean, how would you react iif you found out that your 2on wa2 beaten up by a giirl every day? my mom u2ed two help, but.. That diidnt la2t long..."

" what d0 y0u mean?"

" my mom, ii2 2orta... gone.."

" g0ne?.."

" yeah... 2he.. pa22ed away two year2 ago."

" 0h my g0d. im s0 s0rry!.."

You have a hand clasped over your mouth now. Why did you have to ask him what he meant? All you've done is made him uncomfortable! You can't believe he lost his mother though, and he must have only been thirteen years old. What happened to his mom?.. There is a bit of curiosity eating at your thoughts, but it will only push him farther out of his comfort zone if you ask about her death. You're really starting to realize how much you don't know about Sollux. You suppose you could call him a friend, because he is so incredibly nice to you, but you do want to learn more about him.

" no, iit2 okay. you diidnt know... ii could tell you more about iit... iif you really want two know what happened..."

" n0, n0. its 0kay... i sh0uldnt have asked."

" alriight... anyway2, where wa2 ii?.. okay, well.. my poiint wa2, ii may not have 2ome huge 2uccess 2tory.. but ii do know what vrii2ka'2 torture ii2 liike. ii gue22 what iim 2ayiing ii2 that you may have two face vrii2ka bullyiing you, but you dont have two face iit alone."

".. thank y0u, s0llux."

" no problem..."

You honetly don't know how, but Sollux Captor was able to make you smile today.

**...**

Your name is Sollux Captor.

You're feeling pretty nervous that you've just said the cheeziest thing you could have ever said. _Ever_.

_" alriight... anyway2, where wa2 ii?.. okay, well.. my poiint wa2, ii may not have 2ome huge 2uccess 2tory.. but ii do know what vrii2ka'2 torture ii2 liike. ii gue22 what iim 2ayiing ii2 that you may have two face vrii2ka bullyiing you, but you dont have two face iit alone."_

But, you can't believe your luck. She thanks you, and she actually sounds genuine. You dont actually know why the hell you just spit out all the info on what Vriska has done to you over the years, but you think it may have her helped somewhat to feel better. In that case, you suppose it was worth it. Well worth it. But some little voice inside your head is yelling at you, that you should have asked her out, that you could have listened to Karkat... But you know deep inside you, your common sence knew it was not the time.

_Someday... Not yet._

_Someday, soon._

... 3

**...**

**_Someday, soon... _I will update faster XD**

**Slow writer is slow, I guess. c:**

**Thank you reviewers! You all get hugs you _BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE_. :) 3**


	5. Chapter 5

**Welp, I would only like to say one thing before continuing. Things will get pretty depressing, kinda bloody, and a little scary in the beginning, but bare with me, this is going to be a long chapter. c; Hope you like it.**

**...**

_You were only twelve._

_She looked so happy that day. Her blue eyes were brimming with excitement for the holiday season. She was so sweet and caring. She was a young woman, with a beautiful face and long, wavy, golden-blonde hair. She worked hard for what she had, and made the most of every minute, of every day. No wonder your father had fallen head over heels in love with her. _

_She was one of the very rare people who actually believed in you. She had an unlimited amount of patience with you. She loved you since the day you were born, and she first held you in her arms. She taught you how to tie your shoes, how to wash your hands and brush your teeth. She showed you how to dress yourself every morning when you were little. She taught you everything you knew when you were small. She never gave up on you, not once, and you could always look to her for help. When you were so young, it never occurred to you that she would be gone someday._

_It was Christmas Eve._

_Your mom had wanted to give a friend of her's some homemade Christmas cookies, and she asked you if you wanted to come for the drive. You agreed, you had nothing better to do that day. You hopped into the back seat of your mom's grey car, and she started to drive slowly on the icy road. You watched the snowflakes fly past your window. After ten minutes, your mother calmly broke the silence of the car._

_" Are you excited for tomorrow kiddo?"_

_" depend2, what diid you get me for chrii2tma2?"_

_She laughed at that._

_" Don't worry, I'm sure you'll have a very merry Christmas darling, I-"_

_You saw it before you felt it. She didn't even have the time to scream._

_It was an eighteen-wheeled transport truck. You watched it happen right in front of you. The truck tried to turn onto the route you had taken previously, but it couldn't make it. You never found out if it was just the slippery road, or if the driver just didn't see you. You believe it may have been both. _

_The driver turned too fast. The weight and force of all the truck's cargo collided with the driver's side of your mom's car. Shards of glass rained down on you with the speed of bullets, slicing into your skin like white hot blades. You could feel your neck snap forward painfully and your forehead strike the back of the passenger seat in front of you. Something wet dripped down your cheek. Warm and wet. Blood. The last blurry image imprinted on your eyelids, was your mother's crumpled, broken form. You let yourself slide into the darkness. You welcomed it. You had no one left to believe in you._

**...**

_A light. A pure white light. Thats what you woke up to._

_You stared straight upward into the glare of the lamp, until your eyes burned and watered. You could feel something soft surrounding you. You didn't dare move though; your entire body was in excruciating pain. You felt light headed, and your vision was foggy. Nothing was making sense. Who were you? Where were you? Why were you in so much pain?!_

_The realization struck you in the chest with the power of a wrecking ball._

_The car. The truck. Mom. The blood. Everything came back. Where were you, though? The hospital you decided, you were in too much pain to be dead. _

_No, this couldn't be happening. Your mom cannot be dead. This was just one big dream, one huge nightmare. You would wake up any minute. Maybe mom would come wake you up if you called her loud enough. _

_" MOM!"_

_You screamed for her till your throat felt like gravel. Over and over again, till you tasted blood. She would come, she had to, she couldn't be dead, never. You needed her. You missed her. Tears stung your scratched up skin, and you started to cough and choke out her name. But she never came. She would never come back to you. You heard someone walk into the room. You saw your father. His face was stricken with greif, his hazel eyes red-rimmed and puffy. Tears poured down his face as he saw you thrashing about. A ton of doctors followed after him through the door. They were all trying to calm you down, telling you everything was going to be okay, and to just relax. You didn't believe them. They started holding you down, touching you. They smelled like chemicals. Every touch made you scream, it stung your raw flesh. You just wanted to go home. One of them finally managed to pin you down, before you started hurting people. You told yourself to stop moving to help with the pain, but you still let out a loud wimper when they held you still._

_You had never felt more alone. The doctors forced a pill into your mouth, and gave you a sip of water to swallow it. You were honestly trying not to vomit. But you soon realized what the pill was for, as the pain slowly started to ebb away. With the pain fleeting from your thoughts, you were able to notice more about your surroundings. You could actually see the thick wrappings on your arms and wrists, and the large cast encasing your shin. You were covered in bruises and cuts, some worse than others. But the most painfull physical injury, was your right shoulder. A large chunk was missing, and a long oval patch of skin was gone from your upper back. That was what you could tell from the way it felt, seeing as it was wrapped in a bandage. You cried out as one doctor accidentally touched it._

_Your father's expression from the far corner of the room was a look of pure horror. That look broke you._

_You would have been better off dead that day. _

_The day you lost your mother._

_Christmas Eve._

_**...**_

You wake up in cold sweat.

You're not in a hospital right now. You're home. But today is Christmas Eve.

It was exactly three years ago, today, that your mother lost her life, to a freak accident. It was three years ago that you watched your mother die, and you had a concussion, along with two sprained wrists, two broken ribs, and a leg broken in three places. It's been three years since you lost your mind. For three years, you haven't really celebrated Christmas.

You're crying and gasping for air. You untangle yourself from the blankets, and try to stop shaking. Out of your friends, Karkat is the only one who really knows what happened today, three years ago. Karkat understands why you can never feel comfortable in any kind of vehicle, and why you _always _walk to school. He knows why you never wear t-shirts to school, it's all you can do to hide the scars. He is the only one who knows exactly why every Christmas Eve since you were twelve years old, you have gone for a trip to the cemetery. That's where you will go today.

Your name is Sollux Captor, and you have just remembered everything you've been trying so hard to forget.

**...**

Your name is Aradia Megido, and you woke up very early.

You don't have very much to do today, so you're kneeling at the windowsill, watching your breath fog up the glass pane. Its not snowing yet, but the clouds look like they might just give some snowflakes soon. Your mom is busying herself with cooking and chores, and you're starting to feel like you're getting in the way. You contemplate turning on the T.V, but decide against it as your mom picks up the vacum cleaner. Instead, you walk over to your winter jacket hung up in a dining chair and slide it on. Maybe you could go for a stroll outside? You don't know this town very well, so you suppose it wouldn't hurt to go see what's what.

You let mom know you're going out and pull the front door open, letting a frosty rush of air slap you in the face. You shuffle your boots outside and onto the snow-covered stairs and shut the door. It's pretty cold, but not freezing. You scan the area around you. It takes you a minute to register that you can see someone in the distance, walking up the sidewalk in your direction. Someone with blonde hair and glasses.

" s0llux?"

He looks up at the sound of your voice, and sort of half-runs over to you. He smiles at you.

" hii."

" hi!"

" what2 up?"

" n0t very much, m0m is just trying t0 clean the place up. where are y0u headed?"

" ju2t.. goiing two the cemetery."

" .. w0uld it be 0kay if i came with y0u?... i mean, i d0nt really kn0w what i sh0uld d0 0ut here. its 0kay if y0u want t0 be al0ne.."

" oh, no iit2 alriight iif you want two go with me.."

" are y0u sure?"

" ye2. ii-ii mean, uh, iit would be 2iilly iif ii a2ked you not two go."

Sollux somehow seems more on edge than usual, as if there's something on his mind that's troubling him. He's very high sprung today.

" is s0mething wrong, s0llux?.."

" no, iit2 nothiing."

" if it was n0thing, i w0uldnt be able t0 tell that s0mething is b0thering y0u."

He freezes for a minute, staring straight into your eyes. He looks a bit like a deer in the headlights.

All of a sudden he blurts it out, " my mom diied today."

You just stand there in shock at his outburst, trying to process his words. Wait, does he mean his mother died on _Christmas Eve? _It's unbelievable. Poor, poor guy.. You bet that he barely celebrates Christmas, if at all. He must be going to the cemetery to visit her grave, which would explain the way he's acting today. He keeps glancing at the sidewalk as if it could swallow him up any second. Whatever happened to his mother, it must have shaken him up a lot. Ever since the day he called you on the phone, your interest in the subject of his mother has been unwavering. Though it feels awful, you want to know more. It seems unfair to Sollux, but you crave to know what happened to his lost parent. The day you spoke to him on your cell, he seemed alright with telling you what had occured, but you had chosen not to ask, seeing as it was an uncomfortable subject for him. Would he be comfortable enough to tell you now?..

" uhm, what happened..?"

He appears to hesitate, but makes up his mind quickly.

" ii can tell you on the way there, iif that2 okay..."

" sure, s0llux."

You start walking in complete silence among the snow-cloaked streets and houses. Everything is so quiet and peaceful, the only sound is the crunching of the snow underfoot. The sky stays cloudy, but you still feel some calming aura of the winter weather. You catch yourself sneaking glances at Sollux, who seems to have calmed down considerably. You could be looking at his misty breath in the cool air, but you find yourself once again transfixed by his amazing eyes. It's hard to believe that you're walking down the road next to your crush.. He's so unbelievably sweet and kind. He's smart, he's empathetic, and oh so cute and charming. It feels like you're slowly falling for him every single time you see him, or talk to him. But how can you not?

It takes quite some time for Sollux to say something, and when he does, he sounds a little.. Sad.

" 2he diied.. iin a car cra2h. iit wa2 ju2t 2ome 2tupid acciident."

You're completely silent, waiting for him to continue.

" iit wa2 chrii2tma2 eve, and 2he ju2t wanted two go for a 2hort driive. and.. 2he a2ked me iif ii wanted two go wiith her. ii 2aiid ye2, and hopped iin the car. iit wa2 2nowiing and the road wa2 iicy 2o 2he wa2 extra careful, but iit diidnt mean anythiing iin the end... iit wa2nt her driiviing that wa2 the problem. we reached the iinter2ectiion.. iit all happened two fa2t."

He lets out a shaky breath.

" iit wa2 a truck. a tran2port truck.. ii gue22 the driiver thought there wa2 nobody there, where we were. he triied two turn, comiing our way.. a-and there wa2nt enough room for hiim two turn.."

You clasp a hand over your mouth and your eyes widen, as you realize what he's implying.

" h-he hiit u2 on my mom'2 2iide. all of the gla22 2hattered and t-the car fliipped up2iide-down.. 2he wa2 kiilled iin2tantly."

He swallows hard. It seems almost like telling the story is more painful for him than the crash itself.

" the d-doctor2 2aiid iit wa2 a miiracle that ii 2urviived.. but iit diidnt 2eem liike a miiracle.. ii ended up w-wiith a concu22iion, 2ome broken bone2, two 2prained wrii2t2 and ii.. ii wa2 bleediing two death..."

Sollux is looking down at his feet. There is no word in the english language that could describe what you're feeling right now.

" when ii woke up iin the ho2piital, ii couldnt remember anythiing for a whiile. but when iit all came b-back iit wa2 two much.. they g-gave me a paiin piill, and that niight wa2 okay.. but.. the 2econd niight they had t-two giive me a 2hot two make me fall a2leep, becau2e ii wouldnt calm d-down. ii... on the thiird n-niight ii went iinto.. c-cardiiac arre2t. thiing2 ju2t kept gettiing wor2e. ii had two 2tay iin ho2piital for a m-month."

You and Sollux have both stopped walking. You're looking at Sollux, and he is suddenly thinking the ground is the most interesting thing on earth; his eyes are glued to it. You feel like you need to say something. Something that could make him feel better. But you have no idea what could help, so you decide to at least try and get rid of the silence.

" h0w 0ld were y0u?.."

" twelve."

" s0, it was three years ag0?..."

He nods.

" what happened with vriska when y0u went back t0 sch00l?..."

As soon as you ask, you immediately start to regret it. He starts to tense up when you say her name, as though you're about to stick a needle into his arm. He surprises you though; he answers the question.

" 2he diidnt know what happened, all 2he knew wa2 that ii was iin a lot of paiin. 2he enjoyed that, ii wa2 even more helple22 than u2u2al. 2he diid exactly what 2he alway2 diid.."

You've decided you're out of questions. You and Sollux both continue walking slowly along the snow-covered sidewalk. The silence hanging in the air is no longer a comfortable one, like it was before. Now, it feels like the silence of a battlefield after a bomb goes off. It might be best to stay quiet for now.

You come to the part of the route where you need to cross the street, to reach the cemetary. For Christmas Eve, the traffic is still pretty busy around here. You start walking across the road, but before you make it halfway, an arm wraps around your waist, forcefully pulling you back to the sidewalk!

You almost try and kick behind you, until you realize it's Sollux holding you back. _Huh_? What's he doing?! It takes less than a second for your question to be answered. Directly in front of you a blue car speeds down the street, where you had stood mere seconds ago. There's a ton of ice and wet snow scattered over the road, so it doesn't take a genius to figure out what would have happened if Sollux hadn't pulled you back. That car would stop for nothing. It would have been so simple for that car to have hit you. But it didn't, because Sollux had seen the car coming before you did. You feel like an idiot. How could you not have seen the car barreling towards you!? You would have been _killed._ That car was going at least one hundred miles per hour. Then it all hits you. _Sollux Captor has just saved your life._

You're starting to babble, trying to at least thank him, but so many words are coming out at once. So you do what you can, you shuffle your feet so you're facing him, and you hug him. He opens his mouth, then closes it; he doesn't know what to say either. So he just hugs you back. You just stand there for a good minute, before you speak up.

" y0u just saved my life."

" ii diid?.."

" yes, y0u did!"

You can't stop giggling. There is absolutely no reason to be laughing right now, but you seriously can't help it. You must be insane. But when you look at Sollux, it seems like your laughter is contagious. It looks like he's trying not to be grinning, and its giving him a silly restrained smile that makes you laugh even louder. You must be delirious. Your sides are starting to hurt. Why aren't you stopping?! Sollux gives up, not completely though. He's smiling now, but he's still trying to hold back the laughter, when all of a sudden, he snorts. There's no holding it back now. His laugh isn't perfect, it's very far from musical, but the reason you absolutely love it, is because it's his. You're both laughing so hard, it leaves you breathless. Your sides ache, your face is bright red from lack of air, and you must appear totally bonkers, but you're still in a half-hug, and you're laughing together and that's all that matters. You want to live in this moment forever.

When you finally manage to calm down in the slightest, you can finally talk to him.

" y0u sn0rted!"

" 2o what iif ii 2norted?"

He's still chuckling softly.

" y0u just, sn0rted!"

" fiine, ii 2norted! you got a problem wiith that?"

You both start to laugh a bit more. You just smile and shake your head playfully at him. You grab his jacket sleeve and run across the road. He follows you, a sweet smile still on his face. Your previous incident with the car is long gone, completely forgotten. You both don't care that it's Christmas Eve. Neither you or Sollux care about the cold, or Sollux's little story about his mother from earlier, or anything, for that matter. You're having a great time, despite the odds. You won't let anything ruin it.

You finally reach the cemetery. The perimeter is surrounded by a black iron, Victorian-style fence. The graveyard sits next to a tall painted white church. The site looks to be pretty old. A large cluster of trees stand behind the church and around the fence, their branches bare, and carrying some freshly fallen snow. Sollux steps through the snow into the cemetery, passing the open gate. He knows where he's going so you follow him, walking around the rows of headstones. He bends down in front of one, and uses his sleeve to get rid of some of the ice and wet snow on top of it. You finally get to see the resting place of Sollux's mother. Sollux slowly stands upright. He reaches into his coat pocket, and pulls out a plastic flower. It's a red rose, not unlike the ones you see around Valentines Day. He places it in the snow just in front of her grave. On her headstone it reads, _ Miriam Captor, 1976-2009, A wife and mother, Rest in peace. _Sollux stays gazing at the headstone for a while, before he sighs and turns, and you follow him out of the graveyard once again. It has started to snow a bit. The air becomes more frigid, but you don't mind.

You both start walking home together. Then, out of the blue, Sollux asks you something.

" what do you plan two do tomorrow?"

" im n0t sure. i d0nt supp0se ill be d0ing a l0t f0r christmas this year, seeing as n0ne 0f my relatives are here in canada."

" well, umm.. ii know john ii2 haviing a chrii2tma2 party thii2 year, iit2 tomorrow, he iinviited me. 2o.. ii a2ked hiim iif iit would be okay two briing you, iif you wanted two go, and.. he 2aiid iit wa2 alriight. would you liike two go?"

" sure! s0unds like fun! ill ask m0m t0night."

You've met quite a few of Sollux's friends in the past two weeks. Some of them were nice people, and some not so nice. But John is a pretty nice guy; he's got a great sense of humor, and he seems like he could be a good friend.

You spend most of the walk home just chatting with Sollux, until you have an idea. You lean over at one point to grab a handful of snow in your glove. You mold it into a rough sphere, and chuck it at Sollux. His reaction is perfect. He makes some sort of yelp as it hits his jacket, then he dives for the ground, scooping up a basketball-sized lump of snow to throw at you in turn. Before you know it, it turns into a war.

You are soaking wet, and so is Sollux, but both of you are beaming. You think you really use a mug of hot chocolate, though. Sollux takes your hand, and you go back to the sidewalk.

" ii could drop you off at your hou2e, or we could go two miine, and take you back later."

" n0 thank y0u. i w0uldnt want t0 cause any hassle, i c0uld see y0u t0m0rrow.."

" iit2 up two you.."

The walk to home doesn't take long. When you reach the driveway, Sollux lets go of your hand, and smiles at you.

" 2ee you tomorrow, hopefully."

" bye, s0llux."

He starts to walk away in the falling snow.

" wait, s0llux."

" huh?"

" i.. umm... thank y0u. i had a great time t0day."

" 2o diid ii."

You glance down at your feet. You can't believe you're about to try this. You start to inch forward, then walk quickly up to Sollux. You stop a couple inches apart from him. Your face is lit on fire. You lean forward, and you kiss him. It lasts about three seconds. His face goes red, and his eyes fly open. His lips are surprisingly soft and warm, but you shouldn't dwell on it. You mutter a quick " g00d night" and dash up the pavement driveway. Did you make a mistake? He didn't say a thing.. You throw your coat at the doorknob and go to your room, you don't speak a word to your mom.

Your name is Aradia Megido, and you might just be in love with him.

**...**

Your name is Sollux Captor, and _what the fuck just happened_.

Your face is lit up brighter than a Christmas tree. Aradia just _kissed _you, on the mouth. You must be dreaming.

_Does she feel the same way you do?_.. It seems impossible. What would she see in you? Is it possible she kissed you out of pity? It seems like the most logical answer. You wish she felt the same though... What does this mean? You don't understand. You're still standing in her driveway, feeling like some stalker. Your mind finally registers how cold it is, and you realize the sun is going down. You slowly begin the trek home. It's been a long day.

Your name is Sollux Captor, and you don't know if she loves you back...

**...**

**Hi! Thank God this is finished. Thanks to you, Mackenzie, for lighting a fire under my ass to keep me working, that was just fucking super. ( Sarcasm.) Well, I hope you enjoyed this, readers. Thanks! :) **


	6. Chapter 6

**I love you people. Like seriously, give me a hug. As of now, I have 36 reviews on my first fanfiction story ever. _36 reviews. _I honesty never would have expected that when I'm only 5 chapters in. _THANK YOU! _Now, without further ado, chapter 6. c:**

**...**

Your name is Aradia Megido, and you are trying to quell your nervousness.

For all you know, he could hate you now. Even if he does, when you got home yesterday, you still asked your mother about the party Sollux mentioned last night; it was perfectly okay with her. It's now Christmas morning. Most of what you got for Christmas is clothes and makeup; nothing really big. Christmas funds were tight this year.

You let the scene from last night tug on your thoughts, once again. You still can't believe you kissed him. You've never actually had a boyfriend, just a few crushes. But they came and went, this time it's different. You can't stop thinking about him. You get butterflies in your stomach every time you see him, or hear his lisp-filled voice. It's a strange feeling.

His reaction to your kiss is what's confusing you right now. On one hand, he tensed up, he seemed completely shocked, and he never spoke a word. On the other hand, he became bright red, he didn't push you away, and he didn't leave immediately afterwards; you saw him standing in the driveway from your bedroom window. You're honestly not sure what to think now. If he's upset, what are you going to do? What if he doesn't want to talk to you ever again? You get uneasy thinking about that. But, if he's not angry, what would that mean? Would he just be willing to forgive you, or could he actually.. Feel the same way?... You will never know until you talk to him. The problem is, you have no idea what to say.

You're seated on the couch downstairs, next to the Christmas tree, holding your cellphone in your palm. You have to call him, but you're scared. You try to calm yourself down, and prepare to start dialing, when the phone comes to life in your hand. You nearly drop it as you flinch from the sound of your ringtone. It takes a second for your brain to register that someone just called you. The caller ID lights up on the screen. You feel your chest flutter. Of course it's him, who else could it be? You suppose this is a good sign, if he's willing to speak with you. You press talk and raise the phone up to your ear.

Your name is Aradia Megido, and you wonder what you're about to hear...

**...**

Your name is Sollux Captor, and you woke up to a migraine.

You really should have gotten used to it by now, but you haven't. You held your eyes closed to the light pouring in from the window, and called for your dad; to let him know of the throbbing pain that was splitting your skull in half. He knew the routine better than the back of his own hand. He rushed upstairs to your room holding your migraine medication, and pulled down the blinds over the window, leaving it dark enough for you to open your eyes. You were starting to feel nauseous, but you swallowed the medicine without complaint. Your dad decided to go downstairs once again, having done all he could, while you waited for the pain to dissipate. God, you hate migraines.

It took around half an hour for you to be able to get up. You stretched your sore limbs, put on your glasses, and shuffled your feet down the stairs, one step at a time. You felt a pang of nervousness as you stepped into the brightly lit kitchen, but your migraine stayed painless, for now. Your dad was no where to be seen, but there was a box sitting on the table, covered in bright red wrapping paper. You and your father have a silent agreement that you don't need a Christmas tree, or want one. This is what you were expecting in terms of gifts. You averted your eyes from the present, choosing to drink some water before opening it. You drain the glass and set it down in the sink, wiping your wet hands over your pajama pants.

The gift box was only about the size of a small shoebox. You picked it up, testing its weight, then found a catch in the wrapping paper and started to tear it off. You peeled the tape away from the small cardboard box, and opened it slowly. When you realized what was inside, your heart stopped. You blindly reached out to find a chair, your eyes never leaving the contents of the box. You sat down shakily, setting the box on the table, as gently as someone would set down a newborn baby. Inside the box, was a photo album. It was smallish, but thick, like a large novel. You flipped through the pictures, turning each page in slow motion. In every picture was a sweet smiling face you missed with all of your heart and soul; your mother. In most of the images, she looked younger than you remembered her to be. In a vast majority of them, she stood next to your dad. There must have been at least a hundred pages, but you studied each picture for several minutes before moving on. You don't know how long you had been sitting there, once you finished the album, but you had failed to notice there were other things inside of the box. One of those things, to your surprise, was another box, and when you picked it up to look at the picture on this box, it finally clicked. Inside the second box, was a digital camera. You had to smile; dad really came through this time. You set it aside, and moved on. At the bottom of the box were two more things; a DVD in a clear plastic case, and an envelope. You chose to save the envelope for last. You popped open the case and shuffled over to the DVD player, checked the case for any information as to what the DVD was, then slid the disk inside and turned on the television. You took a seat on the couch, watching the T.V screen intently, waiting for the disk to load.

When the screen flickered to life, you let out a gasp. Your mother's face was framed in the screen. She looked bright-eyed, young, happy, and so.. _Alive. _She was smiling. You felt a pang of loneliness. Her lips parted, and she began to speak, in the singsong voice you thought you would never hear again. You hung on to every word:

_"Hello sweetheart! So, I decided to make this, so I could give it to your father, and I told him to only give it to you when I'm.. Gone. I don't know when you will actually get to see this, so I don't know how old you are now, but today, you just became a year old!" _

The camera turned, to show a little you, only a year old, sitting in a high-chair giggling.

_" I know this may seem a little strange, because I can't actually know what you've been going through in your life, as of where you are. Maybe you just got to middle school, or maybe you have a job, or your own house, or your own children. But I want you to know I'm always there."_

You touched your cheek, to find it wet with tears.

_" I may be in heaven when you see this video, but I'm watching over you sweetie. I'll be with you every step of your life, and so will dad. Because that's our job, Sollux. We are your parents, before anything else, and you are the best gift I could ever have asked for."_

Your vision was blurry, so you took your glasses off, letting yourself cry.

_" We love you honey! I may not be there to give you a hug, but I love you so much, just the same. If your father keeps his promise, and you see this, just know that I would die 100 times if it meant keeping you alive... I felt like I had to do this for you Sollux, because my brother did the same for me, and I know how much it meant to me, for him to talk to me one last time..."_

You rest your forehead in your hands, not even bothering to look up, just letting her voice reach your ears.

_" I love you more than you will ever know, dear. Gosh, there's so much I want to say, but I don't know how to say it.. Sollux, I'm sorry if I caused you any pain, or any sadness. All I want is for you to be safe and happy, and if you're struggling with something in life right now, like an injury, or if you've made a mistake, or if you've fallen in love, I'm standing by whatever decision you chose to make."_

You've started sobbing.

_" I guess I'll just say one more thing. If whatever took me away from you, made you really upset, and if you feel like you can't go on, or you feel depressed, never give up, Sollux. Your father and I believe in you, and we will until the end of time. There's nothing that could ever make me stop loving you. Follow your heart, because it's the most precious part of you. Don't forget who you are.. I'll miss you sweet-pea. So, um.. I suppose that's it... I love you Sollux. Bye.."_

You kept trying to dry your eyes, but the waterworks kept on coming. You held your shirt sleeve over your eyes, and just let it all out. You sat there for twenty minutes feeling like a total mess. Once you finally stopped sobbing, you tried to let some more air into your lungs, but you were still breathing in little gasps. You hated when you were like this. You always felt so stupid and weak when you cried, especially when you couldn't stop, just like today. You told yourself to calm down, and go see what was in the envelope, but when you attempted to stand you were way too shaky. It was hopeless. You sat back down to find the tears coming back. You were starting to wish you could claw your own eyes out.

You couldn't just sit on the couch forever. You tried to ignore the quivering of your limbs, and you actually managed to make it to the kitchen table. You balanced yourself by holding on to a dining chair with one hand. You picked up the envelope on the table, opening it with some difficulty. Then, realizing you forgot your glasses, you walked back to the couch. You put them back on, with a final dab at your red, irritated eyes. The envelope held a cheap Christmas card, with an absurd amount of written words on the inside. By some miracle though, you were still able to read it;

_Sollux, _

_I think we can both agree that the past few Christmas day's were nothing too special. Since your mom has been gone, I've told myself that we would get over it; that we would forget and move on. But the truth is, ever since the first day I saw you in the hospital after the accident, I knew we would never be that same as we were. So, when I found the DVD your mother made on your first birthday, I had doubts that it would be a good thing to show you. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized it was just what you needed._

_Because I was curious, I watched it myself. Something about it made me see things in a different light. I realized that I was so stuck in the past, I forgot that you were going through the same feeling. Every single thing she said in the video was absolutely true, son. Being a parent has to come first. _

_I love you Sollux, and I'm so proud of you. I'm so sorry for putting myself, before you. It was the worst mistake I have ever made, and I pray you can forgive me. I know for a fact that your mother would be proud of you too. You've grown up so much. _

_Have a merry Christmas Son, you deserve it more than anyone on Earth._

_Love, Dad._

Little droplets of water trailed down your cheeks, and fell onto the card. There was nothing more touching that your father could have written to you. He was _proud _of you, and that meant the world to you.

You left the Christmas card on the table, and stood leaning against the kitchen sink, drying off your face. You spied your cellphone lying on the counter, and started to relive the events of last night. _Aradia kissed you._ You don't know what to expect the next time you see her. Wait, didn't you invite her to John's party? You wondered if she still wanted to go with you... You picked up your phone, making up your mind, and dialed her number. You pressed talk. It started ringing, and you tried to swallow your fear. She answered on the second ring.

"hell0."

"hii.."

"whats up, s0llux?"

"can we ju2t talk for a biit?.."

"sure.."

"lii2ten, iim not mad about what happened ye2terday, not at all.. 2o.. ii wa2 wonderiing iif you 2tiill wanted two g-

"yes! i mean.. g0 t0 the christmas party? sure.."

You let out a sigh of relief.

"great. um, the party ii2 at three. ii gue22 we could ju2t walk there, iit2 pretty clo2e."

"0kay. ill see y0u then!"

"okay, talk two you later."

You hang up on the call with the press of a button.

Your name is Sollux Captor, and the things might be getting a bit better, for a change.

**...**

Your name is Aradia Megido, and 3:00 pm isn't coming fast enough.

You want to see him so badly, it's eating away at you. Even if he's not angry at you, you still want to apologize. You hope you're okay with just being friends, even though you wish for more...

You are dressed in a soft, dark red sweater, that used to be your mom's. You run your hands over your skinny jeans, and touch your golden necklace self consciously. You have your dark hair up in something that vaguely resembles a ponytail, but looks more like a giant mess of hair stuck to the back of your head. You don't look very Christmas-like, but you don't care; you had finally picked this outfit after an hour of fussing, and you weren't about to change your mind. You shouldn't feel like you need to impress someone, but you can't help it. You're going to see Sollux, that's reason enough for you.

Your head flicks to the left as the doorbell rings. You race over to answer it, and see Sollux standing in the snow on your doorstep, with rosy cheeks and a polite smile on his face. You smile back, reaching into the closet to pull out your coat and boots. You holler a goodbye to your mom, and she shouts it back. You finally open the door, slipping outside to stand face to face with Sollux.

"hii, ready two go?"

" yup."

You start the slow stroll down the driveway, feeling calm and content. You wait till you reach the sidewalk to say something.

"h0w far is j0hns h0use?"

"not far at all. iit2 liike fiive miinute2 from here."

"0kay, what d0es it l00k like?"

"iit2 2orta cream colored, and very biig."

You relax into a comfortable silence, just listening to your footsteps crunching in the snow, and feeling the frosty wind whip your hair around. It's Sollux who decides to end the calm.

"how wa2 your chrii2tma2 2o far?"

"pretty g00d, what ab0ut y0urs?"

He hesitates before muttering, "great."

"get any nice gifts?" You ask.

"a camera."

"what kind?"

"im not 2ure, 2ome kiind of diigiital one."

"s0unds c00l."

You flash him a smile, and his walking falters, Sollux being seemingly surprised by it. He recovers his pace, though his face burns a bit brighter. You switch your gaze to your boots, making an effort to match Sollux's footsteps. He gradually starts to slow down, and you lift your head up to see John's home. If you were to describe the house in one word, it would be _comfortable. _There were obvious signs of life, and of fond memories here. Multicolored lights were strung up around every window and wrapped around every single tree in the snow-covered yard, regardless of size. A Christmas wreath hung proudly on the front door, bright red ribbon and all.

Sollux walks up the driveway, then directs his path to the door. You follow after him, and he rings the doorbell. John answers the door with a lopsided, buck-toothed grin.

"hi guys! come on in."

You step inside the cozy home, and scan the living room with eager eyes. Most of the people you know from school are here, with the exception of Vriska, _thank god_, Tavros, and Kanaya. Sollux seems to have noticed a certain bully's absence as well; he becomes a bit more at ease, like someone undid a few knots here and there. You shrug off your jacket to hang it up on a hook on the wall, Sollux does the same. The living room alone has more Christmas decorations than you've had inside your house, for every single Christmas Day since the year you were born. Candles were lit, sitting on tables. Nearly one hundred Christmas cards were stood up on top of the fireplace. Holiday pictures in frames clung to the walls, and the tree was shining as bright as a lighthouse.

Your name is Aradia Megido, and you hope this Christmas party will be a good one.

**...**

Your name is Sollux Captor, and you can't believe you're actually here with her.

Aradia seems to be having a good time thus far. She just walked over to chat with Nepeta, who was standing next to a nervous and sweaty Equius. He keeps picking up napkins to dab at his face, but it doesn't appear to be helping much. Yuck. You turn your attention to Eridan hopelessly trying to flirt with Feferi, unsuccessfully. She looks bored out of her mind, until she spots you and gives an excited wave. You wave back, and she grins. Eridan gives you a look of pure disgust, as if you were a piece of gum on the bottom of his shoe. You kindly show him what your middle finger looks like. You turn to look at Karkat and Terezi, who are seated on the couch. Karkat is wearing the most ridiculous Christmas sweater you have ever seen. You stifle a snort, and walk closer to catch what they're saying.

"I NEVER AGREED TO THIS."

"YOU N3V3R OPPOS3D."

"YES I DID. VOILENTLY."

"H3H3H3H3!"

"GET THIS FUCKING PIECE OF REVOLTING COLOR VOMIT OFF OF ME, BEFORE I SHIT IN YOUR CUNTSUCKING MOUTH, YOU LITTLE-"

"4WW, COM3 ON K4RKL3S, YOU LOOK SO 4DOR4BL3! ;] "

"IM. _NOT. _FUCKING. ADORABLE. I-"

Whatever KK was going to say wasn't said, because Terezi decided to give him a kiss. He turns red, and starts stuttering out loud complaints, but both you and Terezi know that the battle is already won. These days, Terezi is the only one who can ever shut him up. You can't remember when exactly the two started dating, but you do recall that it took a _long_ time for Karkat to stop using sarcasm when calling TZ his girlfriend. Terezi is pretty cool, and you suppose she's good for him; it does him well to shut his trap more often.

You take note of what everyone else is doing: Gamzee is chilling in the kitchen, while sipping some eggnog out of the carton. Meanwhile, Dave is wearing an ugly Christmas sweater_ "ironically"_, and trying to bother Rose, while she burrows her nose is some kind of book, ignoring him. Jade just came downstairs wearing a Santa hat, and John is talking to his dad, begging him not to bake another cake today. Everything seems fine; christmas songs are playing on the radio, there's a tray of food, and a punch bowl of some beverage on the table. Next to that, sits a few cheap Styrofoam cups. There is only two left.

Everything is fine, until Jade politely asks you to get some extra cups from John's room upstairs.

Your name is Sollux Captor, and you should have known it wouldn't be that simple.

**...**

Your name is Aradia Megido, and you guess now is as good a time as any.

You have to speak to Sollux about what happened yesterday. You spin on your heels, to see Jade asking him something. You carefully slide across the room until you face him.

"s0llux, can we talk?"

"about what?.."

There's a nervous edge to his voice. Before you can respond to his question, you hear a yell from the other side of the room.

"HEY ASSHOLE."

Sollux turns his head, and so do you. Karkat is still seated on the couch, but his face is twisted in a small smirk, as he points to a spot on the ceiling directly above the both of you. Sollux gets the message first and tilts his head up. His face drains of color. What is he looking at? Your eyes drift upwards, and everything clicks into place.

_Oh no._

You stare at the piece of greenery that could ruin your life today.

A small piece of mistletoe.

You open your mouth to say something, though you don't know what, but it's too late to even try. Sollux grabs his jacket, hops into his boots and bolts out the door, slamming it shut. All eyes are on you, but nobody says a thing. You glance back at Karkat, to see the smirk is wiped off his face. His glance is probably the most worried look he could ever let anyone see. You can't help but wonder what he thought was going to happen.

Everyone still stares at you.

Everyone is watching as your heart breaks in half.

Your name is Aradia Megido, and Sollux is gone...

.._maybe, forever._

**...**

**Well, did someone say cliffhanger? c;**

**Gosh, I'm such a poo to you guys. Why don't I ever update when I want to. Y ME SO LAZY? ;A; In my defense, I spent most of the month of November in the hospital. Long story short, I have a heart condition. It's called Super Ventricular Tachycardia, in case ya feel like Googling it. It's basically an abnormally fast heart rate, and the doctors wanted more data, so I wore a heart monitor for two weeks, bluh de bluh de bluh... Yeah, I'll just keep writing. Expect the next chapter sometime during the Christmas vacation, (hopefully, fingers crossed.) See ya! :3**


	7. Chapter 7

**Hope you like it, and please review. c;**

**...**

White is all that you see. White snow, white houses, white everything. White is the color of purity. White is the color of paper, of clouds, of frost. The color white should remind you of fun times when you were a kid, like racing with the icy winter wind, trying to catch snowflakes on your tongue, or the long days spent outside making snow forts, that always ended with sipping a steaming mug of hot chocolate before bedtime. Instead, it makes you think of pale skin. It makes you think of shards of broken glass, of blood staining snow, of white hospital walls. You've started to learn that the color white means pain. It means death. White is a Christmas color. You hate Christmas. You've given up on trying to like it. You feel like no thing, and no one, would be able to change your mind about that.

You're a horrible person. You ran away from her, without thinking. When something bothers you, running from it is your first instinct. All you can think of is that she has to hate you now. _She has to._ You curl your hands tighter into fists and watch the color drain from your knuckles. You are hiding from the others. You don't want _her _to find you, you don't want _anyone _to find you. You want to sit here in the snow, wet and freezing, until you die. You don't cry; you're fed up with crying. You will sit here for hours if you have to. You will die surrounded by the color white, just as you should have three years ago. Dying when your mother did, would have been the best Christmas gift you can imagine. Your migraine has come back. You will do nothing to stop it. You're waiting for death to wrap its arms around you, and take the pain away. Your jacket is crumpled on the ground a few feet away from you. Your boots were abandoned as well. You don't want them. You are going to sit here till the cold takes you.

Your name is Sollux Captor, and you will be much more useful dead.

**...**

Your name is Aradia Megido, and you have never been so terrified.

You've been out here for thirty minutes with the others, searching for him. You need to find him. But the longer you search, and the louder you call his name, the bigger the worry, that he doesn't want to be found. You haven't seen a single clue as to where he's gone. The sky is getting darker, and the wind has started to pick up. On the walk to John's house it had been nothing but the occasional lazy drift. Now, it was bone-chilling gusts of wind, coming from all directions. Your eyes are watering, and you're colder than an icicle, but all you can think about is Sollux.

That's when something catches your attention, from the corner of your eye. Something black, peeking out from behind a large pile of snow. You bolt towards it. Everything else slips from your mind, unimportant. You're trekking through snow up to your knees, but you can't even feel its chill. You're now close enough to see what the black object is. It's a jacket. Sollux's jacket. When you turn the corner, you let out a scream.

Behind the snow pile was Sollux. His skin was a pale white, nearly blue, and his eyes were closed; he looked dead. But as you came closer, his eyes opened. You are crying, choking on nothing, when you bend down to help him. His jacket and boots are right next to him, but soaking wet from snow. He is resting in the snow, wearing nothing but his T-shirt and jeans. Your fingers fumble to unzip your coat, and you wrap it around the both of you, calling for help. Sollux seems too weak to resist, but it's obvious what he was doing; he had tried to kill himself. You hear him mutter something, and you strain to hear it. It's only one word that leaves his lips, "why?" You feel the words leave your mouth, the ones you never thought you would have a chance to say.

"because, i l0ve y0u."

**...**

Your wet hair clung to your face, which was soggy with tears. Sollux was on the living room couch, with five blankets piled up on top of him. The color was slowly returning to his skin, but he was unconscious. Not a second after you admitted you loved him, he passed out. Gamzee had been the first to arrive on the scene, due to your cry for help. Gamzee had carried him back to John's house, where everyone was now. You looked around at the worried faces. Most of the others, and you, were a mess. Karkat was in a trance, his expression a mixture of worry, fear and exhaustion. Feferi was crying, Gamzee seemed upset, Terezi was "looking" down at her feet, Nepeta was sitting on the floor with a pitifully sad face, while Equius stood behind her, his eyebrows pushed together in a look of concern. Even Eridan seemed a little bit out of it. John was stressed out, searching the whole house for more blankets, trying to calm people down, and telling everyone to keep quiet. Nobody wanted to speak anyways.

You feel positively shaken. You can't help but feel like this is all your fault. If you hadn't of kissed him...

Sollux's eyes open, then close due to the light. Your heart jumps into your throat.

"s0llux?.."

He manages to look at you. Everyone in the room is staring straight at him, but his eyes are only on you. His gaze flickers to John.

"can ii be alone for a whiile wiith aradiia?"

John opens his mouth, then seems to think better of it, and closes it. He gives a silent nod. Everyone else follows John into the kitchen, without a word. Your heart races so fast, you feel dizzy. You're still crying. You're still terrified that he's going to try and run away from you again. He struggles to lift himself off of the couch, peeling blankets away from him. You race forward, choking out some kind of protest, trying all you can to convince him to sit back down. He doesn't listen. What he does do, takes your breath away. He wraps his arms around you, pulling you into a hug.

"iim 2o 2orry."

"s0rry f-f0r what?"

"everythiing."

He's shaking, his head on your shoulder, clinging to you like his life depends on it. You hug him tighter. It looks like he wants to cry, but doesn't have the energy to.

"aradiia, iim a fuckiing idiot."

You try to object, but he interrupts you.

"when you kii22ed me la2t niight, ii wa2 two 2hocked two react, okay?.. "

Your cheeks blush a bright red.

"lii2ten... everyone who tru2t2 me ends up gettiing hurt, and ii know iit2 alway2 my fault... when you 2tarted two hang around wiith me, vrii2ka 2tarted two want you dead. ii dont want you two get hurt becau2e of me, becau2e ii really care about you, 2o much.."

You're still crying, listening without a word.

"aradiia, ii love you... but iim n-not worth hurtiing for."

You pull back to look him straight in the eyes.

"im never leaving y0u al0ne s0llux..."

"plea2e, don't do thii2."

You close your lips, but open them once again.

"s0llux, y0ure the sweetest guy ive ever met. i d0nt w-want any0ne else..."

"...youre 2ure?.."

His eyes are both dead serious, and full of hope. You give him a smile. It's the best answer you can give him. He's quiet. You stand in the silence for an entire minute.

Sollux looks nervous and jittery, but he finally let's himself speak.

"...iim 2orry about how 2tupiid ii wa2 la2t niight, and iim 2orry that ii 2cared you, iim 2orry for gettiing vrii2ka two target you, iim 2orry for makiing you up2et, iim 2orry for gettiing you detentiion, iim 2orry for briingiing you two this 2tupiid party, and iim 2orry for makiing you thiink ii hated you, and... iim 2orry for what iim about two do."

He grabs your face in his hands, and presses your mouths together.

Your arms circle around his neck, and your eyes close. His glasses pinch your nose, so you slide them off. His heart is beating so loud, you think you can hear it. You've wanted this so badly, and now he's here, and he's kissing you. He's warm, and gentle, and he wants this as much as you do. You've never been this close to anyone before. You've never felt so alive. _He's alive._

When you break away from the kiss, you wipe away the unwelcome remains of your tears. You're honestly giddy with joy. Sollux is trying to convince himself not to smile, but it's not working. You lift your head up to look at his features, really look. He seems so much younger without his glasses on. His eyes are brighter, and even more stunning without the cover of the glass lenses. His cheeks are lit up, and his smile is so sweet and genuine; this is the first time you've seen him this happy. Apparently he can still see well enough without his glasses, that he's able to tell that you're staring at him.

"what?"

"0h, n0thing."

He tilts his head to the side a bit. His eyebrows scrunched together, and a little frown that's partially coated with your red lipstick; it's obvious he doesn't believe you. His expression is so cute, you have to stifle a giggle.

"can ii have my gla22e2 back now?"

"0ne sec0nd."

You reach out your hand to gently remove the lipstick from his mouth, wiping it off with your thumb. He jumps a little, before realizing what you were doing.

"2orry, ii diidnt 2ee your arm clearly. youre ju2t 2orta a blob right now.."

You chuckle a bit. Out of curiosity, you hold up his glasses in front of your eyes. Your vision through the lenses is very distorted; Sollux doesn't have very good eyesight, at all. You turn the glasses in the opposite direction, and perch them on Sollux's nose. Once he can see better, you hear him laugh.

"your liip2tiick."

He picks up something behind you. It turns out to be a tissue box. He takes a kleenex, and cleans the rest of your lipstick off, while you will your smile to match his. When he finishes, you plant a kiss on his nose. He starts to blush. Rather than making you embarrassed, it gives you some sort of satisfaction. It's proof that he feels the same. It's becoming one more thing you love about him.

You start to hear some mumbling coming from the door to the kitchen.

"y0u guys can c0me back in n0w," you giggle.

As the door opens, Karkat stumbles out first, which makes it obvious to you that he was eavesdropping on your conversation. You avert your eyes to smile at your feet. Sollux takes your hand in his, twining your fingers together. You look up at him to see his expression is actually a pained one.

"whats wr0ng?"

"ju2t a miigraiine.."

"0h my g0sh, are y0u alright?"

"iim fiine."

"n0, n0 y0ure n0t. want t0 leave?"

"umm, 2ure. okay.."

You look towards John, preparing to explain to him why you're leaving the party, but he heard your speech, so he nods.

"later guys."

You both say your goodbyes and head outside. The sky has gotten pretty dark, and it's a little bit colder. The bare branches on the trees shuddered in the icy wind. You feel a shiver run up your spine, half due to the frosty weather, half due to Sollux's hand still wrapped around yours. The night is quiet and calm. Nobody but you and Sollux are outside right now, so you can finally relax. The snow is crisp and clean, piled in mounds next to the sidewalk, as you walk down the street. You train your eyes to the sky, to gaze at the stars. The small specs of light in the night shine down on you, and you smile. This Christmas night is beautiful.

As your footsteps hit the sidewalk, Sollux turns his head to look at you.

"when wiill ii 2ee you agaiin?"

"s00n. very s00n."

You eventually reach your front doorstep. You lock your eyes to Sollux's, and pull him closer to you. His eyes close as you press your lips against his. The kiss isn't as desperate as the one at John's house; it's more gentle, as if reassuring, convincing Sollux that you have feelings for him. You break away from the kiss, and the look in his eyes is begging you not to go, to stay at least a minute longer. But you can't.

"merry christmas, s0llux."

He doesn't respond. He simply gives you a kiss on the forehead, then on the cheek, then on the mouth. He touches your cheek with his thumb, and gives you a ghost of a smile.

"goodniight.."

He walks down the steps, one at a time, and makes his way down the sidewalk, then he's gone.

You can't help but wish he could stay.

You mutter you yourself in the dark, "i d0nt care if y0u hurt me.."

"its w0rth it."

You run a finger over your lips, then open the door, slipping inside.

Your name is Aradia Megido, and this Christmas was a day to remember.

**...**

**Hope you enjoyed this chapter, have a merry Christmas, and a happy and healthy new year! c:**


End file.
